Planning a bridal shower is much more relaxed today than it used to be. Traditional etiquette no longer applies, but there are still some basic principals that should be followed to make everything run smoothly. Covering the "who, what, where, when, and why" questions will keep everything on target for the perfect shower.

There are three "who" factors to consider. Who is the hostess for the shower? The maid of honor is the key person for coordinating and planning the shower. Whom do you invite? Get a list from the bride. You may also include the groom's list if the shower is co-ed. Who receives the RSVP? The appropriate one is the maid of honor or hostess.

What do you give as a gift? It is best to shop from the couple's gift registry list. If you know the couple intimately, though, it is acceptable to give a gift you know the couple would like even if it is not on the list. Another shower idea is to plan gifts around a theme, such as a kitchen bridal shower. If a specific type of gift is requested, it should be clearly defined on the invitation.

Planning the Perfect Bridal Shower

Where do you have the shower? That is totally up to the maid of honor and the bride. Some prefer to have it in the maid of honor's home while others may prefer a neutral location such as a restaurant. Keep the guest list in mind when planning the location to make sure any elderly friends or relatives will be able to access the location with ease. If you do choose a restaurant, make sure the guests are clear about who carries the responsibility for the cost of the meal.

When is the best time to have a bridal shower? This is totally up to the convenience of the bride and guests. If the guest list will include those coming from out of the area for the wedding, it is best to have the shower a couple of days before the wedding date. Otherwise, anywhere from two weeks to six weeks before the wedding is acceptable.

Why have a bridal shower? The answer is simple--for the fun of it! It is a time for friends and family to "shower" the bride with gifts and memories that will last a lifetime. The trend today is for showers to be co-ed. This affords the opportunity for couples to share in an informal setting. The whole idea is to provide a bridal shower that will be fun and solidify friendships.